Hey guys...Got some new links up. Check 'em out!

  posted by Andy @ 10:42 AM

 
So, it's the end of another week. Thank you, Jesus for the grace of not having to go to class 7 days a week. So, what shall i write? Well, i guess i'll start off on what i've got going through my mind right now...since that's what i always do. I'm starting to look at the things i'm doing, and really analyze them, and see if i'm needed in these activities, and if i am, then that lends more weight to them not being cast away. For instance, I have been working two Yoke clubs(Maury and White Pine), and last semester, not only was it possible, it was easy. But this semester(even though i'm a little past three weeks into it)has just been crazy in terms of being rushed and having a feeling as if i'm always busy. It sucks, because i have this great class(Spiritual Growth and Development with Dr. Brummitt)that i find to be sanctuary and harbor in the storm of life, and i really need to have time to internalize the things i learn in that class, but every Tuesday and Thursday, i would have to gather my things, run down the hill to my dorm, up three flights of stairs to my room, get my guitar, descend down those same steps just as fast as i came up them, get in my car, and leave. Plus, i drive a lot anyway, and those two trips alone account for 50 miles a week. Cutting 20 miles out of the equation, though it may not sound like much, will probably make all the difference. So that's what i did. I quit Maury club on Thursday, and i'll probably start working in the Yoke office in order to make up the difference in Bonner hours.

In other news, I went to New City last night. I left early, thinking, "hey, i'll get there early, get a good spot in the line-up, get a good table for me, Courtney, and Michael, and i'll be relaxed and it'll all be gravy." Well, it seems like everyone else had the exact same thought that i did. Cause when i walked in at 8:22, it was packed, and there were already 10 people on the list. So i guess word's getting out about the open mic night. And that's a cool thing, cause i hope(and i think)that we're attracting some of the better songwriters in Knoxville, and stimulating growth and community among us musicians. And the best thing about the community is its diversity. It's not just us young kids(me, Josh(more about him later in the blog), Brit, and the brothers Cox), there's also a group of accomplished older writers who come and throw their hat in the ring(so to speak). Even though styles and viewpoints may differ between us, we each have so much to learn from each other. If you're a songwriter and you live in the Knoxville area, dont hesitate to come down on a thursday night and share your craft. The relationships I have built in my(1,2...march, april,...) almost eleven months of participating, and baring my soul to whomever may be in the audience, have changed, molded, and grown me to a point that previously i could not have seen my self getting to, not only in my art, but my life. And it's (mainly) because of the encouragement that i have received at the hands of Brantley and Stephen, and Chris, and the rest of the folks at the Cafe that i am the person I am today. And i'd be foolish not to pass that on. I said i'd say more about Josh, so i am. But what can i say? The kid is amazing. (I say kid for a reason.) He's 16, and is more proficient on guitar, and probably just as comfortable on stage now after just a couple of months of playing at New City as I am now. And if there's anything that i know that could help him grow and progress the way that i have, then i'm glad to share it with him. Relationships. That's how we grow. Grace and Peace, my friends.

  posted by Andy @ 3:42 PM

 
I know very well that i should post more often than i do, but on the average day, it becomes hard to pick a thought among all of the things running around in my head to write about in those few moments when i'm on the computer. So i'm doing the next best thing. I'm writing to you on a piece of paper(actually, three)with a pen, and sitting in my room. I know you're thinking, "Wha?? Why not just sit at the computer and write us something?" Well, technically, i am. I have to type this in, you know. There's no way to go straight from paper to computer.(I ain't no magician.)

Having said that, it's time to let the thinking/feeling muscle have some exercise. It's been a while since I've said some things about what I'm struggling with, so here goes. My constant weak points(for those of you who haven't read something on here before, that's pride, lust, and selfishness)are still my weak points.(If they weren't they wouldnt be constant, would they?)But they are revealing themselves in different ways now.

My pride is continually being puffed up by what i call "a constant paranoia" that makes me think that every girl i see likes me, and might want to date me. I know, I know. Where do i get off thinking every girl at Carson-Newman likes me? Heck, I dont know. I'm only just now admitting to myself that i think about this. So i havent even begun to think about how i combat this "paranoia". Christ, continue to show me how sinful I truly am, that I may know more my need for you. It's not that I'm not satisfied with Courtney(I actually could not be more satisfied), but there's a part of me(i.e., not my true self) that always wants more. And this carries over into so many parts of my life, that it's no wonder why i'm a mess. My flesh wants...more, more than even Christ gave on the cross. Christ, forgive me where I fail you. It wants more and wants it now, and cannot stand to wait. Even for a holiday by the sea. I'm sorry, Lord, for being far too easily satisfied by my mudpies and my lustful, covetous passions to remember your sacrifice and the wonder of your glorious grace...but more than anything, I'm sorry for pushing you away when i should have been leaning on you the entire time. Christ, you are the only one who can see the road ahead of me. May i cling to you, as you guide me along paths i do not know, and ways i cannot see.

(Wow. That wasn't even the thing I've been thinking about over the past couple of days. This is going to be a massive post.)

The thing that's been bouncing around in my head is sort of a usual thing to be bouncing around. Especially in my head.(btw, it's about 2:10 in the morning, so i'm not liable for incoherent sentences)And true to form for me, i've already talked to a lot of people about it. But i bring it here, not that I necessarily seek the cousel of the few who read this page(though i do), but more for me to sort it out in my head.

Over the past week or so, i've been reconsidering my involvement(short as it may be) with my church youth group, and my position as the main worship leader. One of my worries is money(again, the selfishness kicking in), and how far the $20 a week i get will go if i'm driving to and from Halls twice a week, downtown Knoxville once, to White Pine and back to school on Tuesdays, and to Dandridge and back on Thursdays, as well as the occasional trip from C-N to Maryville to see my beautiful and lovely girlfriend. That's a whole lotta driving. 250 miles worth to be(somewhat)exact. And you know what? Even with all the mileage I'm putting on the Native every week, that's not why i'm reconsidering. A thought i had recently focused me in on the real question behind this. I was sitting at the cafeteria on Thursday with my friend A.J., and we were talking about this, and i said to him, "If I was meant to stay and lead worship at my church, then God would have put me at UT, or somewhere else. But I'm not there, and i'm not a part of that community any more. So why do i go back?" And the truth is, i dont know why i go back. I dont know whether it's me wanting to please people, and not leave them hanging, or that i'm afraid to finally pull that part of my roots out of the ground and move them to Jefferson County, or whether i truly do love it, and have a calling to be there. Well, this is where i am. And prayer is very appreciated. If you have any comments/feedback, the email is always open, and always working. I answer email as soon as i read it, and i check the mailbox(at least)a couple times a day while i'm up at school. Ask anyone who knows me...I am rather anal about the whole mailbox checking thing. And always, if there is anything you need help with, email me, and to the best of my ability, my help is yours. Grace and Peace be unto you, my friends.

  posted by Andy @ 2:46 AM

 
Sup folk. I thought i would post before i left for Ba-Yo-Ca today, so i'm here. Posting. To you. Last night, we had Matt Wertz in to play at ye olde 3rd Thursday Cafe. I hadn't heard him personally before, but had heard some friends of his, and some of his music before, but not him. At the very beginning of the concert, we had some technical difficulties involving a bad mic cord, so Matt played the first couple of songs unplugged while the sound guys were figuring out the problem and then fixing it. (*warning* Rant in progress) We(EPC) seriously need a new sound system. Because this junk of us using a conglomeration of systems and trying to accomodate artists that are probably used to using different(re: quality) stuff aint gonna work. But anyway...what was i saying? Oh yeah...about Matt. To be honest, he really impressed me with his skills of an artist. If i could be at his level(granted, i'm completely different stylistically from him) of control over his voice and guitar playing in 6 years, then i'll be doing good. But anyway...pray for my lovely girlfriend, she's been sick, and yesterday had a fever of 103.7...so just pray that she feels better. I'm gonna head off to go pack, so i'll talk to yall on sunday at some point. Grace and Peace.

  posted by Andy @ 3:22 PM

 
Hey guys, i just got back home from church...I've got some things on my mind, and i guess this will be the river into which this stream will flow. I'm back in the flow of things(if you could call it a flow)back at church, leading worship on a weekly basis. I guess the way that the new system(we're trying to mix it up a bit) works is that we have music every week. And that carries both its good and its bad along with it...the good is that the more that i'm leading in worship, the more comfortable i become at it, and the bad is probably the increased drain on my funds. Not the best bad thing that could come...I guess that if you read adam's blog, then you'd know that Nothing Done has broken up, which in my opinion, is a sad thing. But there's nothing i can do about it...unless i get the stick and beat adam senseless when he comes in tonight...(just kidding) There's really nothing to do about the situation. If he feels that dissolving the group and giving up a lot of music(not playing guitar or writing) is what God is calling him to do, then i have no argument against that.

This weekend is going to be good. Friday, i'll be leaving to go up to Camp Ba-Yo-Ca for Yoke leadership camp, and this will be the first time that the "Native"(one of my nicknames for my red 1996 Jeep Cherokee) will be making the trip up to camp. It's definitely time for a weekend at camp. I need to get off by myself one night and just sit and look at the stars. And listen. Not talk, not pray, not sing. No noise, just the beauty of silence. That's what i need. To tell the truth, that's what everybody needs. You(yeah, you. i'm talking to you.)need to get out of your house, and away from the computer, away from the office, away from your cell phone(God forbid that someone can't reach you), and go. Just go somewhere. Take your bible, and a good book, and go to someplace peaceful. Even if it's for a couple of hours. It's a break in the storm of life, and it's good no matter how long or short it is.

Now, all that being said about leaving the email behind, i'm going to talk about it. If anyone has questions for me, or thoughts about my writing, or the site in general, i set up a mailbox expressly for the purpose of anyone being able to contact me, be it for booking(see info about me), or to talk about my lyrics, or anything else that is on your mind. The address is andyvandergriff@yahoo.com, so feel free to email about anything...i'm just tired of not having anything in there. So, be busy...Get to work! While yall are typing away...i'm going to bed. Goodnight, all. Grace and Peace be to you by Christ as you go through your day.

  posted by Andy @ 12:23 AM

 
I've been home for about an hour, and i can hear the freight train steaming by from my window. I'm surrounded by walls of brick and steel that protect me from the elements, and protect the elements from me, on those random occasions when i have strength not to face them. And it's been a while since i've rambled. Just rambled, no rhyme or reason or banner to wave, or war to fight. Just rambled. I feel as if i'm sitting at someone else's desk, and i dont quite know what or why i feel that way. I guess cause the computer's not mine, nor the books, photographs, keyboard, crates, alarm clock, or Santa. But the lamp's mine. The thing that gives light to all these things? Yup. It's mine. Yeah, my books are across the room, but still. Everything's going to be different next year. The room may be laid out in the exact same way, even down to all of Adam's stuff being here(dont know what he would think about that...'hey! all my stuff's gone!'), but it's still going to be different. He'll be gone, and i'll be here. You know, i'm kind of looking forward to next year-when i'll be able to write to you on my own computer, surrounded by pictures and trinkets of my own. It will be good. Not because i'm in control, or know what's going on, but because i'm not, and i dont. Christ alone knows what i will be doing tomorrow, and i praise him for it. Father, make me more aware of your love for me, that i may always magnify your name.

  posted by Andy @ 1:13 AM